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Wednesday, February 11, 2015

The Man from UNCLE looks like too much fun.



In a world that takes all the wrong lessons from the success of Christopher Nolan, Guy Ritchie shines as a beacon of agenda-less fun. His Sherlock's were fun. All his movies are, more or less. TMFU could have been a grumpy, remember this show?, paint by numbers meal ticket. It's not. There's no way this trailer is selling a facade. It's got campy 60's thriller in it's bones and I want it. I want it right fuggin' now.


When's the Kingsmen come out?


Tuesday, February 10, 2015

The Vanishing of Ethan Carter? Yeah... it's pretty damn great.



It's somehow more beautiful than a picture. How the hell did they do that?
I'm just 1 hour and 2 puzzles in and I'm hooked. Sure it's beautiful, a lot of games are beautiful. Sure, the game cribs a lot from Lovecraft, that's going around these days. This game is what I wish a lot of what I've played lately were, compelling.  The acting is good, the story is better and I could go on an uneventful walk in this virtual wood for hours. I wouldn't even have to stumble on a failed ritual sacrifice to stay interested.

But I've said too much. It's $10 on steam right now. Get your otherworldly murder mystery fix.

Step into my office.


Sunday, February 8, 2015

Work's been hell.


I chose to take up an unreasonable amount of shifts at the restaurant during a week everyone and their mother was in town for one of multiple conventions. In other words, I've spent the last 4 days running around a mosh pit screaming at the top of my lungs.

I... need a minute.

Wednesday, February 4, 2015

The rebooted, slightly longer, and astonishingly even bloodier history of the Whalfast Estate.


I like Darkest Dungeon, I like it lots. But I also like things that hurt me often and needlessly, read into that as much as you want. I'm getting better at it... or at least I think I'm getting better at it. I'm becoming concerned I'm not improving as much as I'm getting lucky.

While the cruel wheel of fate that is this game's turn by turn dice roll makes every second absorbing, one bad fight can positively ruin an entire party. Erasing the majority of your progress, and leaving you with nobody but rookies to tackle the over leveled missions that remain.

When DD decides to stack the deck against you, it practically seals you in a wine cellar. In other words, I don't think this game's being as fair as say, XCOM, or Dark Souls. Maybe it shouldn't be. But I live for rougelikes like this and I've never felt so blatantly abused before. What I mean is, it's hard to develop a strategy when a couple missed strikes and one enemy critical hit make them all moot.

I hope DD learns to play with it's food more in the future.

Tuesday, February 3, 2015

The short and bloody history of the Whalfast Estate.

My family, my legacy, my decades old meticulously curated/alphabetized porn stash... all gone.

Well... damn. Darkest Dungeon has pimp slapped me harder than I'd dared hope. I had a man down in the tutorial.

The tutorial!

I've never started a game over in less than 5 minutes before. After an hour in, I'd lost my original crew, thankfully I never liked my plague doctor (who can't actually heal you) and my leper proved to be more badass than a man with a terminal degenerative condition has any right to be. Seriously, he shouldn't be able to walk straight.

This game is designed to humble. Programed from the ground up to break your heart. I say it has done so. For an "early access" game this sure feels like a full release. I I bet it falls apart in the end game, though.

So if you feel like chipping in 20 bones to be part of the tester army... and it looks like it's already Steam's top seller, do it. It's a steal at twice the price. Seriously, I'd happily pay $40 for this kind of strategical turn based agony.

Happy 5th, Nerdist!


I've been a huge Chis Hardwick fan since at least 2010. And since 2010, I've also become a fan of Matt Mira and Jonah Ray. Comradery is a fickle, frustrating, chemistry that a lot of podcasts out there don't pull off half as well. The Nerdist is about these three dudes as much as it's about Paul McCartney, or Bill Gates, or Tom Hanks those two times. Oh, and that Mel Brooks one is an all timer.

They can get prickly sometimes. Vaguely antagonistic, in a way most shows or podcasts would edit out. But they leave it all in, or a lot more than a PR rep would be comfortable allowing. In that way it's the most honest podcast I've ever listened to, as well as the most fun.

They deserve all the success they have, I'd even go as far to say @midnight is the best late night show since the Colbert Report.

I mean, look at this! This is culturally significant:
 

So happy birthday!

Sunday, February 1, 2015

So... Darkest Dungeon looks good. I'm having a rough week.


I just can't seem to get myself to bloggin'. I dunno why. Whiplash broke my heart, I had expected more from it. Mostly, I don't understand how Miles Teller keeps getting work. He held back "The Spectacular Now" (another movie where the female lead is inexplicably attracted to... you know what? I shouldn't.) and was just ok in Whiplash. He wasn't bad.

Also the second episode of Tales from the Borderlands should be out, now I remember why I always waited for the majority of their episodes to release. Because they lie. All the damn time. They're no George RR Martin... but still, "around" January 27th today ain't.

But Darkest Dungeon! It's in early access, but I can still see me enjoying the crap out of those bare bones. Yeah, maybe that'll get me out of my funk.