Postcards from the edge of a CL4P-TP.

Bubbles!

The Pre-Sequel gets a bad rap. Sure, it was a cheap cash-in that was  made up of  at least 40% recycled assets from Borderlands 2, but I loved it/am still loving it. Pretty much everybody that was on board for the PS cleared out by the time Clap-tastic voyage rolled around. The fact the expansion was also the funeral for 2k Australia made it's tepid reviews even sadder. But if you loved cl4p-tp the way I love cl4p-tp, this is was everything you could have wanted in terms of retroactive continuity and clappyness.

Here's a bunch of fun stuff you may have missed while not romping around in the code of a terminally insecure robot.

His name is Harold Tassiter.

The age old battle of cookies versus...

...shame.

Quake before the mighty SPONX, mortal!

His name's Jack and his head's in a box. Right?

 

Take some time out of your day. Sit down. Read quest flavor text.

XCOM2: The deepening.

Scorpion voice pack mod incoming in 3, 2, 1....

I loved Xcom2. It wound up being my game of the year just barely beating out Civ 6. Mostly because I knew something like War of the Chosen was coming. Just like Enemy Within, War isn't an expansion so much as a second chance. The devs took a long hard look at the vanilla game and saw what they could do better. Enemy Within made the original almost perfect, I'm hoping for more of the same.

I'm going to tear into every drop of info Firaxis lets slip because this all looks spectacular. I mean... there's a whaler class now:

Silenced sniper rifles and claymore mines? Yippie-kai-Yay! 

Ah, what the hell.

Ch-ch-ch-ch-CHANGES.

Ok, so Andromeda wasn't Bioware's finest. Inquisition wasn't exactly a home run either and ME 3 twisted it's ankle so hard in the end it's foot snapped off. Bio's seen better days, but even still, Andromeda would have been the first game of theirs in 10 years I've only played once. That kinda bummed me out especially since it's... fun. Not "great", or ground breaking, or even remotely as compelling as any previous ME, but still... fun.

I bet I make it halfway.

 

 

 

At least now your scanner looks more like a computer and lot less like melty copper bullsh*t. So that's neat!

A buring question... answered.

Why aren't there tent pole adaptations of Discworld in movies, TV, or even gaming? Now that I'm  knee deep in the work of a writer I've only recently discovered was my literary spirit guide; I notice the abysmal quality of his adaptations. The fact the first season of American Gods wrapped before anything noteworthy from the Pratchett estate got produced drives me nuts.

Is it the orangutan librarian or Death of Rats? No, even Sci Fi can afford CGI characters these days. It couldn't be the lack of material or a dearth of talented writers clamoring for a chance to produce their Vimes fan fics. This could be the next crossover hit. Pixar or HBO need get on this... why haven't they? We can get American Gods on the air, America! We can do anything.

Then I started Interesting Times. In which Terry Pratchett calmly, politely, and most englishly calls China a Kafkaesque hell hole. "OOOOOOHHHHhhhhh." I said to myself. "Yeah no, Hollywood needs China way more then they need the Rincewind saga." Do you remember Alibaba's credit during Rogue Nation? I sure as hell do.

One last thing about Terry Pratchett.

Thanks, karelias!

Where most writers use exposition he chooses to tell short stories. And on the occasion he does use exposition, they all seem to turn into jokes. Good ones:

"Ankh-Morpork had dallied with many forms of government and had ended up with that form of democracy known as One Man, One Vote. The Patrician was the Man; he had the Vote.”

Holy crap I love Terry Pratchett.

He was the kind of writer that's far more talented then they want you to believe. Sure, Discworld books are funny. Sweet Moses, they're funny. But after finally picking up Guards! Guards! I'm blown away at how much character and detail is every single line of his dialogue. Each character has lived a full life and will keep on living it after the book closes. I know we all want a Watch TV series, but Pratchett's other works have so much to offer you'd be just as happy with a show all about Cut-Me-Own-Throat Dibbler.

Admit it.

Cowboy Bebop TV series! ... from the producer of Teen Wolf.

Are space corgis cheaper in CGI?

...and the writer of Thor: The Dark World. Yeesh. I'm all for second chances, lord knows I've been given a few, but this pedigree just makes my hair bristle. There's never a wrong time for a noir space opera with a barnstorming jazz soundtrack, but please not these guys and not this property.

This belongs to someone else. A mini series by Shane Black would be perfect. But we do not live in a perfect world. We live in a world where North American remakes of anime classics can't stop crashing and burning. I honestly forgot all about Scar Jo's Ghost in the Shell. Already.