"Welcome to the Daily Show, My Name is John Oliver"

For the first time in 14 years, the hosting duties of the Daily Show have changed hands.  For those who just clicked the hyperlink, "who the hell was Craig kilborn?" indeed. In the last decade, this show has become more than a source of some of the sharpest political satire. It is seriously how I get most of my news. I've grown to trust the trade off of its largely liberal bias with its grade "A" bullsh*t detector when it comes to either party.

As 24 hour news has eroded practically all objectivity in American journalism, no one has taken them to task for it more than Jon Stewart and his tireless writer army on the Daily Show. Stewart has essentially been the Daily Show since 1996, the one constant in a vast revolving door of corespondents.

 A dire topic of conversation with a few friends years ago started with looking at two clips back to back (one from 98' and one from 09') laughing about how much closer he looked to death; then slowly coming to grips with how our personal Cronkite was human and couldn't do this forever. One suggested Jason Jones would take the reigns.  The other threw back what was left of his gatorade shaking his head. He tilted his head down, giving us the "one second" gesture, essentially saying  "There's no way in hell Jason takes over...and there's glacial freeze in my windpipe."  But after watching a sketch they had done the week before, I had become convinced that they had already made their decision. I said Oliver was gonna get it.

They both thought about it, but eventually came to an agreement that it would go to an up and coming unknown, except for me. I wanted to bet money on it being Oliver. That clip only seemed like half a joke and when that conversation came up with other people I told them who I was betting on and more often than not they thought it was the wrong horse.

So when I first heard the news about Stewart taking a break to direct a film I broke down and went into full tilt victory dance mode. "I F**KING TOLD EM'!!" I yelled for a good five minutes. I made a few toldYAso texts and didn't hear anything back...it was clear nobody really gave a damn. Or maybe they were too crushed to face me text to text! Yeah, yeah that's how it went down.

So Oliver has the big chair now, how'd he do? They've canceled shows over lesser things than a different host before. He did fine. Very well, even. Though I do miss John's "titter breaks" when he buries his face in his scribble paper. Oliver smartly avoids aping Stewart's candor and of course his accent is a loverly change of pace. For the record, Oliver's pan-southern accent is better than Jon's. But never say "all OF ya'll" ever again. That was physically painful.

We've known for a long time that Oliver was A. one of the best corespondents since Colbert (his career turned out alright) and B. he's just a damn fine comedian underneath. It's actually weird how not weird this regime change is. Should the unthinkable happen, one of my favorite shows is in good hands, this could have been much more awkward that it was. So it is with the utmost respect that I personally say, to you, John Oliver:

Go F**k yourself.

You magnificent, limey, ponce.

Harmon is back on Community!

I certainly don't think Season 4 of Community was it's finest hour(s). But darn it, if it didn't do right by it's story structure and characters... for the most part. But my ears certainly pricked up when, for the past few weeks, there were rumblings that NBC had secretly approached Dan Harmon with an olive branch to return to the show. But since he had been; in his view, coolly pushed out, the odds were good that even if the red showrunner carpet was laid at his feet, he would pass anyway.

This was thankfully not the case. Not only is Community coming back for 13 more episodes, not only is Harmon back in the driver's seat, not only is the wonderful Chris Mckenna going to write for the show again, but now I think we can finally pierce ('scuse me) piece together what really drove him off the set in the first place.

I'll be honest. I have no concrete evidence on any of the following, but it looks very likely Chevy Chase's industry clout, disdain for the show's writing, as well as personal issues with Harmon specifically, got him the boot a year ago. Why? Well all these "return" rumors only started swirling after the last episode aired. This was also Chevy's last. The man barely clocks in four minutes of screen time and was also noticeably absent for several other episodes this season, but that's more my critical issue with his career choices than evidence.

By looking at the only major difference going into season 5, that being Chase's character being written off the show, the absence of Chase seems the most likely cause. Maybe NBC thought fresh blood in the creative department could help the ratings and backtracked when they decayed even further. Maybe it was both. But now I think it's fair to say that the feud had at least a very big hand to play in this depressing chapter of one of the best written American comedies of the decade.

But who cares?! Harmon's back, the weight of Peirce as one note character and Chase's toxic "behind the scenes" presence is gone, and now we as the audience have the chance to see the show end as it's creator intended, or at least, intends.

  So I think I speak for all Greendalians when I scream at the top of my lungs:

See? didn't even use one GIF.

The 5 Burning Questions E3 2013 had Better Answer.

So sad.

1. The Steam Box...what's going on here Valve?

What is it? We know it's not the piston because there's no way in console hell a $1000 anything is going to make a difference if your brand don't look like an apple. So is it a cheap PC attached to a TV attached to the Steam network? If so, that's one hell of a gamble. Valve has a hard core group of supporters, but they all have PCs. If what I've been told is the case, how then will they evangelize the console crowd? I have an idea, and that idea is almost as frustrating as my next question...

Flirt!

2. Beyond Good and Evil 2, AKA my achy breaky heart.

Grump.


3. Xbox One. Yes or No answers only.

The core crowd is fuming over just how evasive Microsoft has been about explaining to the public the shadier details of the product they're planing on purchasing. Details like, The publisher has the say in whether a game can be traded. And yet, Microsoft offers a one time, 30 day trial gift thing, to a friend on your list who has been a friend for longer than 30 days.

M'kay, that's certainly different. But here's the rub: "from time to time, Microsoft may change its policies, terms, products and services to reflect modifications and improvements to our services, feedback from customers and our business partners or changes in our business priorities and business models or for other reasons." Translation: we don't know how any of this is going to stick and reserve the right to make everything we've told you about this product irrelevant especially after you've so kindly filled our coffers.

Boo. And I mean ALL the boo's. It's crap like that, that kept me from buying a PS3 until 2010. I can personally vow to not touch either console until a year after launch, because the quote above is basically a platinum card of consumer oriented f**kery. I sir, will have none of it...for a year or two at least. Destiny might be fun.


4. The Last Guardian: So is it coming out or... you know what? I don't want to know.

You have know idea who or what it is...yet, you love this chicken-dog-duck.

The voraciously anticipated spiritual successor to what is literally the Citizen Kane of video games has been trapped in limbo for this entire console cycle. I see the writing on the wall. Either it's dead and buried, or it's a frankenstein-ian corpse of a creative mis-fire. Either way, it belongs forgotten. Would you want to see a long lost Orson Wells film in which Wells himself had walked off the production halfway through? That's what I thought.

Maybe in the last; Jesus, five years, they've managed to turn it around and it will be an earth shattering masterpiece/the perfect swan song to the PS3 as it comes sliding down a rainbow of world peace and then takes us all out for gelato. I'd love to be wrong. I'm also not holding my breath.


5. Hey, Hey, All the Guys! What's this gonna cost me?

That's the real question isn't it? Everyone remembers the infamous PS3 $600 downer from the last console cycle, and it was justifiably the reason the 360's install base had Sony swinging at air all this time. I say no one is going to sell a console at that price, or at least the point of entry won't $600. Industry analyst Michael Patcher says it will be less than $500. That's...generous. But this cycle literally cannot afford to loose, If they do end up costing under $400, expect to spend $200 somewhere else. There's no free lunch in this, or any other business, and I think I know how they're going to get that money back. You ready?

$70 games.

Soooooooo sad.

Beyond Good and Evil 2 tries my patience for the 4th time in 8 years.

Hodup-hodup-hodup... Pey'j? are you here to break my heart again? 'cause I REALLY don't feel like waiting a year in between screen shots of what you claim to be Beyond Good and Evil 2. This started getting ridiculous four damn years ago.

All's I'm saying is at E3 this time? You'd better pick up what you've just thrown down or I'm not buying what you're selling... that's not true. I'd buy two copies if you asked nice enough. And I know you will buddy.

This video came out when I had two years left in high school.

*cries in a pillow.*

Hannibal: Roti Review. What?! oh, Ew! Jesus...wow.

nowwheresmynut

This is it. The part where a show looses steam and the wheels fall off. Sometimes we forgive them and learn to live with their faults for a few seasons. Sometimes the gleaming promise of the pilot isn't enough to keep it from needing a bullet to the head.

This is not the issue with Hannibal. Not. At. All.

This is what the death throws of a major network looks like. It is awesome.

 It is reaching into the rarefied air of shows that started off good and only got better. This is some Breaking Bad, Mad Men, Game of Thrones type stuff and I cannot wait to see what else it has up its sleeve. Because that is one disgusting, horrifying sleeve.

So... what all went down last night? In short; it was the best chapter to date, in long, it was the triumphant return of Eddie Izzard's identity conflicted killer Dr. Abel Gideon. There's a biblical point somewhere in his character, but damn if I can't figure it out. Izzard is wonderful in the part, I knew he would be, whats more important is how they up the ante in the crazy serial killer busy work department. Not once, not twice, but three times I either groaned or gagged or cursed out loud. Se7en, only did that twice. This isn't just a well written and acted show, this is the new gold standard of body horror.

Everyone else has plenty to do as well. Graham, Lecter, Crawford, Doc Bev, and even Freddie Lounds have their parts to play and moments to shine. Graham in particular reaches critical mass in terms of loosing his grip on reality. His lucid dreams and hallucinations are among the most unnerving not just so far, but in the annals of "creepy as f*ck" dream sequences of old.

The special effects, makeup, and action sequences were as feature quality as they always were, but never over indulged. The perverse creativity of the episode's many kills are allowed to shine. As are the eerie, long winded, justifications for their purpose. Not that I mind a long winded script once in a while...I could listen to Izzard read a whole phone book.

But the best news out of all of the fresh blood this show has spilled, is the fact a new order of 13 episodes has been placed by NBC for next year. Fuller has issues not with being a wonderful show runner, but keeping those shows on the air. I'm comfortable calling Hannibal his masterpiece and it does this young heart good to know some of that enthusiasm I feel can trickle down to studio executives. 

Bon Appetit.

Thank...well, not god,but umm...hm.

                                                   

Crackpot Theory: Could this be the last E3?

One of the threes in the name E3 is Nintendo. Curiously, they've decided to skip gaming's biggest annual trade show. Semantic issues aside, that is a humongous vacuum left by gaming's oldest and most respected surviving publisher. But lets not pretend this is shocking. They drunkenly stumbled into the launch of the Wii U, after gorging themselves on the mainstream juggernaut that was the original Wii. They learned the biggest draw back to appealing to the casual market in the most financially painful way possible: They don't give a flying F about what else you want to sell them.

Because of this, the Wii U has sold under  the launch numbers for the Gamecube and that... that is just depressing. As such, exclusive content is jumping ship and the future prospects for the company are dismal. As a PC and PS3 core gamer, this would be the perfect time to put on my burgundy smoking jacket, gaze out of my drawing room window at Nintendo's flaming shipwreck, and cackle subtly into my glass of 67' Pierre Ferrand Grande. Yeah that's right, grand with an E! 

But I won't do any such thing. The performance of the Wii U is a sobering portend of doom and a sign that the game industry is headed for a crash not seen since the arcade collapse of the mid to late 80's. Ask any financial historian to draw a straight line to the primary reason gaming survived that catastrophe at all, and it will lead to Nintendo's front door. Whoa. Dang.

This could be it folks, if the new consoles don't make enough to survive, Sony and Microsoft may not be able to afford to attend another trade show. And while E3 isn't necessary, I say it is vital for the fan bases and the developers that stoke their fires. The industry needs excitement. It needs that light at the end of the tunnel, it needs the school yard rivalries, the petty one-up-man ship, and the goofy, tin eared, presentations.

We love you guys because of this stuff.

I say the pageantry is essential in a way the Oscars are essential. Yes, both industries could survive without their biggest annual get together, but at what cost? E3 is the soul of the industry, even if you hate it and everything mainstream it stands for...you will still pay attention to its headlines. I will personally miss the crap out of this festival of polygons if this should be it's curtain call. But I think I know what I need to do to steel myself...

                                                                   
                                                                   I needed that.  

BBC's: The Fall, Review.

Wow, where has Gillian Anderson been? It seems like ages since the X Files ended. Well, it actually has been ages, but you wouldn't know it looking at her in The Fall. She's everything she used to be and then some as Belfast bound, homicide detective, Stella Gibson.

Belfast has a sordid history of crime, revolution, and corrupt police work. Bringing operation "music man" to a close would be extraordinarily difficult in the best of circumstances. But The Belfast PD have other things to worry about than a stalker serial killer. Things like dead cops. That's one of the more refreshing things about this series, the world doesn't stop for this case. In fact, half the show isn't about the police at all.

The Fall is more interested in a Columbo type plotting. In that, half the show is all about the murderer. And he is a trip. This is a career making performance for Jamie Dornan as Paul Spector. A grief consular, family man, stalker of successful and powerful black haired women, and strangler of aforementioned successful black haired women. One minute he's crusading for a battered wife's well being, the next he's painting a naked corpse's fingernails. Spector isn't a monster...or at least he isn't always a monster. He becomes the most three dimensional serial killer since Dexter Morgan. 

Its the little things about him that make him eerie. The way he condescendingly mimic's his boss's movements, how he's noticeably out of his wife's league (as a man who needs to control women, that can't mean nothing), the way he avoids bonding with his six year old daughter, the way he winds up bonding with his six year old daughter, and then there's the sketches he makes while he's supposed to be therapizing...yick!

Crrrrrrrreeper.

Anderson also does great work with her coolly smug, yet effortlessly awesome detective. Her brilliant case breaking deductions are made by sensible connections and not some throwaway line from a secondary character in a forced "OF COURSE IT ALL MAKES SENSE NOW!"scene. I'm very pleased with that.

The story is never a tense cat and mouse scenario. Instead its about both people (Anderson and Dornan) living their lives. Its a thriller that bides its time and never really resorts to jump scares or mad dashes to the killer's location. It lets the action  play out and speak for itself, almost like it was adapted from case notes. The Fall is fascinating precisely because it can be boring sometimes.

It can be a problem, though. There is plenty of dead air you can spend discussing the show to a friend and miss someone getting shot. Leaving both parties to scream "What the hell just happened?!" as you both scramble for the ps3 controller to wind it back. I mean, the police corruption story is interesting and all, but too often it feels like a segment from a spin off of the show's characters. It's not a useless appendage, but its obvious the writers couldn't come up with enough for the main cast to do.

Of course, that is the only complaint I can lodge at this show. Sometimes its not as interesting as it is at other times and that's true of everything. Including movies, beer, and chocolate (and also sex). The Fall is the second police drama in as many months to really blow my hair back. Its tense, terrifying, well written, and phenomenally acted. If rain-drenched and pensive UK police procedurals  are your thing then this will make you happier than a pig in poop. I cannot think of a better use of your time than this...except, of course, this.

Recommended Viewing:

   Columbo: Because it holds up surprisingly well and Peter Faulk was a treasure.

Thanks, Amap0la!

Once upon a Time: Because you won't find a better produced soap opera and Giancarlo Esposito shows up sometimes.

"No, I told you, NINE episodes."

    The X Files: Because duh.