C and C episode 56!

Chamberlain and Chance - Never good enough

This isn't gonna steal my joy.

Man, I've had a corker of a sh**y week. I worked 5 double shifts in a row, 2 of them nightmares. Then I tried to get Resident Evil 7 up and running on my first day off after 51 work hours and my top of the line rig shuts it down before the title screen.

No. I'm gonna get mine this weekend. I've been lost in ps2 emulator land for over a month and I need my AAA game itch scratched. What can I do? What's $20 off  on green man gaming that was... faintly praised by my podcast buddies?

Hmmm. What to do, what to dooooooo?

Come to think of it, wolf eye sockets are perfect for belt loops.

Oh, what in the screaming bloody F&*K Capcom?!!

I love PC gaming to tears, but there are times that all the money and effort spent trying to get the damn things to work won't pay off. Resident Evil 7 is one of those times. I've had games run badly, I've had games crash randomly, but never have I EVER played a game that wouldn't even let me see the title screen.

Thank Christ the steam refund policy is in place, I would be so much more angry if I had to wait a week or two just to be able to fiddle with the graphics options. The last game I refunded was Arkham Knight and I at least got to play the damn game first.

So I'd love to tell you how good RESI 7 is. After it's knocked down at least $30.

What the inside of my head sounds like right now.

Roosevelt's theme from Civ VI has been echoing through my brain for weeks now. It's been oddly comforting to me so here it is, just in case one or two of ya'll out there need it too.

But lord knows I can't keep my happy face on forever and it's only a matter of time before that tune devolves into... something else.

2017's gonna be fascinating. I hope we make it.

No one seems to want to talk about Dragon Quest 8 anymore.

Wait... f&@king what?!

I mean, it's not like the game goes out of it's way to tell you a party member is under the age of consent and gives her a "sex appeal" stat. She's a 17 year old who literally uses sex as a weapon. It's leery eye fades to the background the vast majority of the time. That being said, when DQ8 does get it's perv on it is, for lack of a better word, stunning.

One of her attacks involves her flashing monsters to... distract them. Yeah. I'm out.

John Lewis gets his.

March

Most of the time I don't want to make the Crackpot political. But then most of the time the president-elect doesn't childishly put down a man who was cracked in the skull on the Edmund Pettus Bridge. Turns out Rep. John Lewis is laughing all the way to the bank. His graphic novel/memoir box set has completely sold out over night.

I wouldn't go as far to say that Trump is "illegitimate." but for this man to loose his cool like that over something like this may be the most spectacularly ironic event in American politics.

PS2 reunion tour: GOW II is still a f@$%ing masterpiece.

Allow me to set the mood:

I remember I used to be a huge fan of God of War, until 3 just... shattered my heart* (another post for another day), but Dark Souls took up it's place and ran with it for years. I had assumed modern action games had left it in the dust and that I'd probably give up on a play through 4 hours in. This was not the case at all.

Most of my PS2 jaunts these last few weeks were all the great JRPG's** but I forget how gracefully GOWII has aged. The bloom effects are a bit too much, but other than that, I'd barely change a thing. The puzzles are great, the loot's hiding places are brilliant and 2 of the greatest boss fights of all time are in here. The fates, man. They killed me on titan mode so many times 10 years ago I almost beat them with my eyes closed just now. But I still like that fight and that is the mark of greatness. You memorize a game inside and out and you still love it.

It's been a long time since you were a critical darling, Kratos. Here's to your comeback!



*it ran out of both money and ideas a 1/3 of the way through and ended with the exact same finale as II. The fact that they're only now making a game set after 3 and it's abandoned Greek mythology entirely I think proves that they didn't like the ending either. Oh. OH! And that creepy surrogate daughter sh*t with Calliope. Where the hell did that come from?! GRUMP! 

**Seriously where are all the great JRPGs these last 2 console generations? The ps2 era was absolutely lousy with em'.