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Tuesday, February 21, 2017

Coloring in History

I just got done with a hell of a week. 8 days straight, 57 work hours over 2 jobs. Wanna know how I dealt with it? I cheated. I cheated at Civ 6. I got hammered and played perfect games and I know I should feel a little guilty. But I don't. It was awesome, though I concede I wasn't actually playing Civilization VI.

If I was, every turn would carry a tinge of regret over my decisions mixed with a shudder of fear over Montezuma's troop movements. I can see what you're doing Monty, cut that sh*t out! Civ is stressful it's actually something I love most about it. But sometimes I can't deal. Sometimes I just wanna color in the fog of war and I don't want anyone standing in my way.

I had an ex that loved adult coloring books and that's the closest analogy I can think of. A theater square here, a Chichen Itza there, and soon several calming gaming hours have passed. I can forget about the cloth napkin shortage, the broken freezer crisis, the Camry title card affair, and dead Russian ambassadors. I've turned one of the greatest strategy games ever made* into a zen garden. You know what the funniest thing about it is? Even with all the money, luxuries, oil, and iron in the world; Peter the Great still managed to pull from behind and out-culture my ass. Say what you want about Civ's AI, it's still capable of some pretty cunning sh*t.

*it's already better than Civ V and after an expansion or 2... I can't even imagine.

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